Tag Archives: Relationships

Life out of the closet

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Since going public with my dysthymia and depression, a few different people have asked me a variation of the same question,

“But _____ reads your blog, are you sure you want them to know?”

Sure, I could have just come out of my mental health closet to anonymous readers who I’ll never meet face to face. Perhaps my story might help a young reader who feels like they are currently going through something similar – that would be fantastic – but it wouldn’t serve to break down the barriers which I’ve spent so many years building.

Yes, people at work read my blog. (Hi peeps!)

Yes, parents of my children’s friends read my blog. (See ya tomorrow on the playground!)

Yes, my neighbours read my blog. (Can I borrow a cup of sugar?)

The honest admissions that I’ve made are about changing the perceptions that society holds about depressed people. I have an illness but that doesn’t define who I am.

I’m an involved and active mother.

I’m a wife in a loving and happy marriage.

I volunteer on committees and host playdates.

I’m a member of a book club and a writing group.

I’m a productive and sociable co-worker.

I’ve acted in plays and sung in musicals.

I’m a healthcare worker who loves to help others.

Sure, there may be times when I mope around in stained sweat clothes and eat chocolate… but who doesn’t? My depression doesn’t usually manifest itself outwardly because I have spent years and years building a life in spite of my illness.

Sometimes, when things get to be a little too much, I may falter. Perhaps I won’t return your phone call right away, or I’ll beg out of a social gathering that I promised to attend. Maybe I’ll look a little extra tired and run down because I’m having trouble sleeping. There are times when my depression gets the better of me, but that doesn’t change who I am.

So, to answer the question… Yes, I want the people who I know in real life to read about my depression.

That was the whole point.

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Friday Flashback – The Sister

Flipping through old family albums it is quickly obvious she was my first friend.

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The Sister and I had our moments when we’d fight, and there were periods of sibling rivalry, but we have always been tight… as you can see from this Headlock of Love. Continue reading

Ode to my cousins

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The Sister and I have a lot of cousins but we grew up in Nova Scotia and all of our cousins lived in Newfoundland, Quebec or Ontario. Needless to say, we didn’t get to know them very well when we were young.

There are some cousins that still remain a mystery to me. I remember images of them from a family reunion or pictures that were enclosed in Christmas cards but they are mainly just names. There are cousins with families that I will probably never meet.

There was one group of cousins, however, who we did get to know better than others. These were the children of my father’s three sisters. Dad was their baby brother and efforts were always made to visit and reunite whenever possible. But still, it wasn’t often enough. Continue reading

He’s a charmer!

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If you overlook him plying me with drinks from the open bar, the story of how The Husband and I began dating is quite a romantic one. But it’s easy to be romantic at a beautiful wedding with music and dancing, wooing me long-distance while I traveled around the world was a much more daunting task.

I did a share of the work, by booking my off weeks to visit him in Toronto as much as I could, but when The Husband was merely The Boyfriend, he went well beyond phone calls and e-mails to court me. (Ha! I just realized how funny him “courting” me sounds… considering I was a tennis umpire and he’s a lawyer!)

Over the eighteen months that we dated long distance, here are just a few of the amazing romantic surprises I experienced.

11 Romantic surprises from the early days

Continue reading

Funny things my kids say #14

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(Apologies for my extended absence. I was waylaid by the flu last week and have just gotten back up to speed.)

On Friday morning I overheard the 6-year-old start this conversation with his brother,

ET – “On a date, do you think it is better to go to a movie or go to dinner and drink wine?”

CJ – “A movie.”

ET – “No, I mean if you are adults and in love.”

CJ – “Oh, then definitely dinner with wine.”

ET – “Yeah, I think so too.”

I’m not sure who my boys are planning on wooing… but at least they’ve got class!

Previous: Funny things my kids say #13

Friday Flashback – Pax

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When I was young, my first pet was a hamster. I named him Super Ben and even made him a little cape to wear. Sadly, he died in the first month of owning him (nothing I did, I swear). Turns out that replacing a dead pet on the very same day that it died is a great way to alleviate a child’s grief! Thanks to Mom, I quickly recovered from the loss and named the new hamster Super Ben 2. He lived a long and full life. Continue reading

Six months

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Holy crap! It’s been over six months since my first post. Wowza!

Looking back over the 106 posts, I can see the evolution in my site and I’m proud of its growth… have you gone and looked back over my 106 posts? (That would be really great for my stats!)

Growth in the number of views and followers, of course, but also in my content and style. It has become more personal and I can hear “my voice” more clearly. I planned to keep you all at arm’s length, but as I wrote and you commented, I couldn’t hold you back.

So, thank you! Thank you readers for reading and thank you commenters for commenting (you know I love you.)

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I have tried to keep things light and witty but life can sometimes make that hard. As fun as it would be, my life isn’t all Scooby-Doo and Fantasy Island, it’s also the diseases I work with and my own personal struggles. So, thank you for sticking with me, no matter what the topic, and especially for sharing your own stories during the serious times.

I expected to have a lot of support from my family and friends because I have great family and friends. But I have been deeply affected by the amount of support I have received from complete strangers. You have rocked my world!

By its very nature, this blog is a work in progress. It will continue to mature as I become more confident in my writing, but it will also grow because of you. I now write knowing you are out there. I want you to read my posts and be happy you gave me that time. I’m thrilled to be giving you mine.

Here’s to the next six months!

Dear reader, do you have any suggestions for me?